If we don’t stand up to the Pro-Spoon lobby, who will?

We Need To Ban Spoons.

Not All Spoons…Just The Bad Ones.


We’re sick and tired of the pro-spoon lobby getting their way in this country.

Every year over 300,000 Americans die from obesity-related deaths according to the CDC.

We’re calling for COMMON SENSE Spoon Control legislation in America….It’s time.

If we can save just one life from obesity, it’ll be worth it.


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7 replies
  1. Robert Glaze
    Robert Glaze says:

    Ha Ha Ha, LOL LOL LOL. Every American has the right to purchase, own, and carry as many neutron bombs as they can afford. Only morons deny that.

    –Clinger Holsters Response–

    We feel that you have so much wisdom that needs to be shared with the world, Robert.
    Thank you for blessing us with your profound wisdom today.

    We all had a good time discussing how ignorant we’ve been up until now.

    Thank you for shining a bright light into our unacceptably dim world views.

    Keep on Keeping on, Robert. Keep on Keeping on.

  2. Jeramy Holt
    Jeramy Holt says:

    To expand upon this. The regulations to make weapons less effective as a work around is the same as if we decided that the ergonomics of the spoon makes it easier to take more bites more quickly. If we changed the depth of the concave in the spoon, it would hold less at a time making it harder to gorge on food. If we regulated the angle and size of the spoon handle it can make getting that spoon to your mouth harder (without poking your eye) and less comfortable in the hand. This would lead to people wanting to buy the more reasonable sized spoon since it can comfortably fit in the hand while having a handle at a more ergonomic angle, and the smaller capacity means less danger. And don’t get me started on the parkinsons Utensil loopholes. These devices have gyro-stabilizing technology that makes getting a full spoon payload to their mouth much easier. These were designed only for those who truly need them, yet strawman purchases are rampant. Then they find their way into regular peoples’ hands, where they can eat more quickly without spilling a bite due to this extremely dangerous design of gyro-stabilization.
    The founding fathers never expected the spoon technology that we have now. They were still using, primarily, wooden utensils and had the manners to know better than to slurp soup straight from the bowl.

  3. J.R.
    J.R. says:

    HAHAHAHAHA. Wait so should I stop giving my kids deep fried Twinkies AND whole milk. What in the hell are they supposed to snack on after Trump rallies?!?

  4. Ronny Long
    Ronny Long says:

    Let’s see how many lib-tards agree with you because they don’t detect the sarcasm!!! Remember that they’re usually completely devoid of a sense of humor and can’t detect comedy very well :)

  5. Joe Boy
    Joe Boy says:

    Don’t give these lunatics ideas! You’re just kidding but watch these idiots take up the fight next month!!!

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